Rant about Body Scanners

I had an option to travel this Christmas and it would have been better than staying home alone BUT I could not face the ordeal of travel.

First of all, you got to report early because of increased security measures and of course airports see more traffic than usual. The pat down does not bother me because the officers here explain what they are going to do and why and do it in the most professional way without causing me offence.

Once you've cleared security, time to repair yourself with a nice breakfast (or meal) but oh no! you can't cut the dried bacon and hard sausages with that plastic knife. The server explains they can't use real cutlery because of security risks... and I am wondering what damage can a food knife cause when it has a rounded edge.

So you give up on the idea of eating and you plan to have some biscuits with you and a bottle of water (this way you save on the horrendous markup of airport outlets.) But oh no, you are not allowed to pass your water through - it may be bomb material! But you are welcome to buy a nearly £2 bottle from the shop past security. I ask myself... can a terrorist not make a water delivery to the shops with some doctored bottles amongst the shrink wrapped ones on the palette? Of course they can! But it helps the economy if they force you to buy things after security.

Then you have to squeeze into tiny spaces they call seats and eat your microwave meal on your chest. (We are talking business class here, eh? BA actually served micro meals out of a black container that they had to peel the plastic off in a recent flight, I kid you not.)

You can't hydrate your hands or face because lotions and potions are limited - forget about perfume, toothpaste, etc. It is too much hassle trying to squeeze things into little containers and being questioned what they are. If you are lucky, you might find some lotion in the business class torture chamber which they call W.C., but more likely they wouldn't have restocked it because of a strike or another.

Of course if it is chilly (and it usually is this time of year) and you've managed to secure one of the few blankets, you are stripped from it one hour before landing because you might be preparing a bomb under its cover!

Then you arrive at your destination without mishaps, apart from that sauce that landed on your blouse and the bruises you got trying to negotiate the seat and aisle space. And you have to wait for ages for your little suitcase to arrive on the conveyor belt because you were not allowed to take it on board as you have a nail file, a pair of nail clippers, a pair of cuticle scissors, and that thing you use to pluck your eyebrows plus numerous bottles of essential liquids/creams that you can't live without and you don't want to have to buy locally and then discard barely used.

But you are safe.

In the meantime, somewhere around the world, somewhere where the average person wouldn't be able to pinpoint on an unmarked map, somebody is dying because of our countries' politics. A soldier or a civilian, it doesn't matter. It is a human life ended before its time. But hey, we are safe! Just close your eyes, cover your ears and sing a tune. No need to fight for civil liberties, no need to question the establishment.

Just walk through that body scanner. It is for your own good. Trust the people you have not voted to represent you wisely. How dare you suggest it is for the scanner manufacturer's benefit and for the politicians who approved its use? Preposterous!